It is day two of the juice fast. I have a friend coming to visit on the 16th. I can only do this until about the 12th, so I can slowly break the fast. I also have to be very careful during the break so I don’t destroy all of the hard work that I will have put in. And then back on the fast.
Why am I doing this? Not for peace. Not to find Jesus. But to cleanse my system, lose weight and get back on a healthy track.
How do peace and Jesus fit into this?
I have been thinking about fasting for a few weeks. For the last two months I have felt like a sluggish lump, and I can feel the weight of grief I carry with me over my darling 8-year old grandson, Thomas’ battle with cancer.
So I did a Google search on fasting and many, thousands, millions of sites popped up.
Almost all of them, well okay those on the first two pages, spoke about finding Jesus or being guided by Jesus, or finding their Christian souls. As soon as the religious stuff started, I moved on.
Then I found a site with a picture of Gandhi on it. It had good, but limited advice about juice fasting or “Juicing”. It was a sub-page on a site called codepinkalert.org. A political site and the fasting was to move the US government to bring our troops home.
So back to Google. I kept finding info from one particular site, and quotes from the books the site owner had written.
I needed some better information and juice recipes. So I bought his e-books and am reading them on my computer screen. Not fun-at-all. And I am glossing over the Garden of Eden, Heaven, and Hell stuff.
Yesterday I longed to sit comfortably in front of the fire with my doggie and read.
“Oh if only I had a Kindle.” I said. I have resisted the idea of a Kindle until the pain of reading from the screen hit home.
Anyway back to the fast. November was a month of horrors for our family, every day Thomas suffered more form the chemo, side effects, and other barbarous things the doctors were trying in order to shrink his massive tumor. My beloved and I suffered with him and our son and daughter-in-law. We cried a lot that month, and we wished for a miracle.
My beloved even said he would give his life for Thomas.
One weekend in mid-November, I started feeling tired and achy. Then I had a serious bout of diarrhea, and could not eat. I did not even want coffee. I could barely keep Jell-O down. My sweet husband made chicken soup from scratch, and I sipped that. On Monday I dragged myself to the doctor. He prescribed B-12 shots. I felt energized and better within hours.
Before that I was down, out, run down and going down for the count.
There comes a time when your body speaks. And mine was screaming, deafening shrieks:
“Help me!” “Cleanse me!” I am compelled to do this. And I know I will feel better, look better and be healthier afterwards.
Yes the sadness is still there, we worry about Thomas every day. We call our son, and react to his state of mind: if he is calm, we are calm. If he is troubled, we are troubled.
But he and his wife and older son need us to be there for them through Thomas’s battles. And I cannot help if I am sick, sluggish and dull.
This morning I made a strawberry/blueberry smoothie with only a half banana to thicken it. Delicious and refreshing.
On to the new organic market in town to find more goodies to juice up!